Right now I'm afraid.
Mostly I'm afraid of myself and exactly how fragile a person I am emotionally.
You know those times when something comes along that turns your whole world around? I suppose that you would consider right now one of those moments.
Today was bad really, recently I've been feeling more ill and stressed, but I've also had some wonderful times with Adam, we've enjoyed doing up the room for him to move in with me, and that seemed so close today.
Circumstances were against us I guess. We couldn't tell his parents because there was a whole mess with his car breaking down and his Mom's operation and all didn't make for great timing.


But that's not what I need to get off my chest. I've had an odd nervous feeling recently, and today I think confirmed what that was all about. I took another pregnancy test which I do frequently because of my irregularities and paranoia. Only it came back positive. Never has anything changed my thoughts so quickly. I had to tell Cara, she saw me start to panic. And obviously Adam was there.
This morning, our biggest worry was telling his parents we were going to live together. This afternoon, it was finding the money for a new car. This evening I am so swamped with mixed thoughts and emotions that I can't even contemplate this.

I don't know what to do..